81 points

There’s an old folk thingy from Borneo that claims Orangs can, in fact, talk. But they don’t, because if humans found out they’d be forced to get jobs and pay taxes.

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47 points

Makes sense to me. If I got to spend my whole life chilling in the forest and some weird bald fuckers came and tried to make me work and pay taxes I’d do whatever needed to convince them I’m just another ape and continue to chill in the forest

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11 points

work and pay taxes

I’m just another ape

Colonialism: “Why not both?”

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35 points

And yet they put them to work gathering palm nuts for palm oil anyway

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Based and Ankh-Morpork Unseen University librarian-pilled

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24 points

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7 points

This is like in Liu Cixin’s 3BP when some human try to make the population more stupid in order to devolved from being an advance civilization to not get destroyed

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79 points

plays stellaris once

why can’t i make the bonobo population into a client state?

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25 points

Imagine trying to enforce our volcel rules here in a world where bonobos are posting

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16 points
*

Struggle sessions about sex and porn would finally get interesting though.

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15 points

ah but they dont have butts, us ass-ed hominii will dodge all their ass related horniness

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71 points

this is a classic sci fi plot

And every single fucking time it goes bad for the people involved

Like literally every single instance of a species being uplifted in sci fi is a cautionary tale about interference with others, and usually has the uplifted species be violent/used as a weapon

Literal fucking Torment Nexus bullshit

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All (good) sci-fi is an exploration of issues that already exist in our world, just with the added distance of future/tech that allows those issues to take an even greater shape.

This whole “uplifting primates” bs is just sci-fi talk for neoliberal development economics, it’s just saying the quiet part out loud, in that people from poor countries are an inherently inferior species.

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24 points

The Culture Series would like a word. Although sometimes when they interfere things do go bad and that’s part of the narrative, but the majority of time they don’t interfere it results in self destruction of civilizations

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18 points

i dont think the Culture ever engaged in anything so crude as this suggestion. they do really fantastical manipulations of biology and physics but just to themselves and minds. the less intelligent animals are still pets

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10 points

Yeah you right, I’ve gotta read more of those tbh

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14 points

Stuff doesn’t go bad per se in 2001, where it’s heavily implied that humans were uplifted. It just gets real trippy and then the sequels sucked.

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5 points

My thought too. Isn’t this the prime example people think of when they think of uplifting in scifi?

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9 points

The Uplift series begs to differ.

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7 points

Would you bother reading/watching/playing scifi media that didn’t have some sort of conflict, like everything just went great?

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11 points

I wouldn’t, but that doesn’t mean I want the sci fi conflict to happen in real life.

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8 points

I’ve actually read some utopian literature. It’s cool to see what people in the past saw as an ideal future. We could use a little rebirth of the genre tbh

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3 points

Maybe you’re right, maybe the Tomorrowland concept is what the world is missing right now? Everything is a conflict to be overcome, noone imagines everyone just working together to achieve amazing things.

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61 points
*

They used to extract value from animals on industrial scales, like horses and stuff. They still do now of course but it’s very grisly (watch dominion) because it’s more about getting their flesh, skin, oil, etc.

Anyway, we used to use them in “jobs” but it turns out machinery and mechanization was way more profitable, dumbass.

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39 points

Ah, but what if we forced them to work for Uber before chopping them up?

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“sorry George, you only have 4.5 stars on Uber. Drive to the monkey nugget factory for reassignment”

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you are describing a horse cab

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We don’t need more workers you fucking idiot, like half the Western population pushes around numbers on a spreadsheet for living. If we want more productivity maybe we should force these assholes onto an assembly line building stupid bullshit before we fuck with porcupines.

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30 points

Yep, if we weren’t burdened by the Protestant work ethic that dictates that everyone should work, we could have a society where everyone takes turns working on a farm once a month and can do whatever the fuck they want the rest of the month. We’d still be able to feed everyone and society wouldn’t collapse.

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