Basically, title
Edit her unit learning guide so that the due dates on all her stuff are a week earlier than they actually are.
One option is trade offs. Tell her if she study’s for an hour, you’ll do something she likes. That sometimes works for me.
The other option is to just be as gentle as possible, bring it up in a joke(risky). If she’s just trying to get motivated, tell her about all the cool things she’ll be able to do or become once she finishes classes, while telling her to study.
All this being said if she is just content with getting a C or B in the class and is confident in her current knowledge to get that, then maybe just let it be.
Lots of good ideas here, but don’t forget to discuss these ideas with her first.
I’d recommend reading ADHD and Adults, it’s a good intro to how ADHD works differently in adults than children.
Then maybe talk about her difficulties with her, and ask how you can help. Work to understand her perspective first, what she finds difficult, what she finds frustrating.
Then pick one thing, together, that you can help with. You need to work as a team, taking on challenges together (this is sort of relationships 101, it’s a team thing).
Thank you for the book suggestion, it’s on my radar.
Then maybe talk about her difficulties with her, and ask how you can help. Work to understand her perspective first, what she finds difficult, what she finds frustrating.
We discussed about it earlier this weekend. In summary, she finds hard to study because it still seems “far away in the future” (it’s in early September), and on the other side, she also feels like even if she studies a lot for it, she will never feel ready.
She has already failed that exam in the past.
I can’t figure out if she has even asked for his help on this, if she hasn’t then perhaps he should just back off until she does.
Break up now. She’ll blame you for everything that goes wrong between now and a few months. Also, you dont want to be the guy driving her to every drug store in. 50 mile radius looking for Vyvanse and Adderall on finals week.
Do not try to become her manager or parent or psychologist or coach. It will negatively impact your relationship.
https://www.getinflow.io/post/adhd-authority-issues-defiance for some ideas on why.
If you have a problem with how she is behaving, you will not be able to change it through external influence. If she really has ADHD (emphasis on disorder where it is negatively and significantly impacting her life AND is diagnosed) and is unmedicated, the single best thing she can do is get medicated, and that’s her choice. If medication isn’t working, she should talk with her provider about it.
If she requests help, feel free to provide it. Feel free to ask her (and not internet strangers) if there’s something you can do to help her as she’ll know what works and what doesn’t as ADHD isn’t a monolithic diagnosis and what works for one person might drive another up the wall.
Sorry if this seems a bit negative, but I was in school when all the Where There’s a Will There’s an A and all the techniques in the world did not make a difference to people that can’t utilize them, but they can frustrate and shame people.
