Or do you prefer other adjectives? Do you consider it to be insulting or do you take it for a compliment if it was meant as one? (Assume an amenable relationship between the two people, not a random stranger or creeper)
I imagine this is a very specific to the individual , and the context in which it is used
Like a handful of other people in the comments I never dress up or wear makeup, it’s black pants and a t-shirt for me. It’s usually a graphic t-shirt that is silly so if someone’s like “oh cute t-shirt” sure, that’s fine. But if they’re talking to me specifically cute feels infantilizing. I’m a 33-Year-Old woman, I either look fine, nice, beautiful, or like a deranged raccoon holding a knife.
I often look like a deranged raccoon holding a knife - and am excited the look is catching on! 😉
Are those in increasing compliment order? In that case, I can say with confidence that your post sounds like you’re a deranged raccoon holding a knife!
Depends on context. “Cute” can be infantalizing and condescending, or not, or somewhere in between. In general, any blanket statements about relationships comes down to context.
I was going to say it really depends on who is saying it. A creepy old friend of your uncle’s? Please No. A cute guy you are also interested in? Yes please.
If you are not sure just say nothing. Silence is always a great option
“Alright, we have at least 6 witnesses willing to testify that they think I’m pretty. If you confess and say that at least I’m cute, we’ll let you get off easy.”
“I wanna talk to my lawyer.”
bad cop begins routine
“HOW DARE YOU, THEIR OUTFIT ALONE IS FIRE!”
”good” cop pulls the bad cop off you
“Sorry, my partner is a loose cannon. Look, we just want to make sure you’ve got good taste.”
Scientifically this has been proven again and again. Good looking saying something, getting something, doing something is acceptable. Unattractive has no access to the same things.
I’ve pondered this a few times now I’m older. When younger the things I could say to women and get a positive response was amazing, compared to now I’m older. I was fit, good looking and cheeky.
It’s just what it is. Attractive always wins. Be it income, access or acceptance (in your example).
I’m OK with my age and not being as attractive as I was, but every now and then the cocky young man in me wants to complement a lady, but I move on. The moment passes. I’ve matured emotionally and happily carry on.
The most important thing I ever realized, if I want to compliment a woman, you never compliment her on her features, you compliment her on her choices. “Hey you look cute” is automatically going to put her hackles up. “Hey, I really like your dress” is a neutral statement you can make that doesn’t make you a danger. Which is what most women view men as after a lifetime of being treated as prey.
Source: three daughters
