And apparently, also when you think that ‘They’ is a perfectly serviceable gender-neutral singular pronoun, but are willing to use other pronouns if asked to.
EDIT: Other removable offenses on Blahaj now include questioning mod/admin decisions and quoting the modlog as a reason why you’re leaving.
admin makes a post saying they will enforce the rules around banning people who refuse to use neo pronouns, in a meta community for trans people, and every cis loser has to jump in and play the victim when they get banned for breaking the rules in the post was made to say the rules would be enforced. cry harder.
Dragonfucker is a cis loser. She is trolling, and the dumbass mods of Blahaj Zone keep falling for it.
Wild that you’ve just ascribed she/her pronouns to drag, that’s definitely a weird level of transmisogyny.
I don’t know if Drag is serious, but I do know they demonstrate the shallow, insincere progressivism of liberals just by existing.
Basically my feelings. I don’t take any neopronouns too seriously, but it costs nothing to use them and is one of the fun quirks of the fediverse. I’ve seen people assert that drag is both a cis man and a cis woman in this thread, so apparently it isn’t that obvious that they’re trolling
YDI.
gatekeeping sure is when you tell someone their gender isn’t real. especially under a post that specifically says “hey don’t tell people their gender isn’t real.”
edit: removing my comments below because the discussion is no longer about respecting trans identities and is just a slapfight. fuck transphobes and get over yourselves on a single tiny user who you should have blocked months ago if you actually had a problem.
gatekeeping sure is when you tell someone their gender isn’t real. especially under a post that specifically says “hey don’t tell people their gender isn’t real.”
Their claimed gender is literally a dragon.
Dragons aren’t real.
Dragons.
Aren’t.
Real.
sounds like you and the other user will find more fulfillment in other communities than one that is specifically created to be trans accepting. i’m sorry that this user who was exhibiting trollish behavior was your first experience with a person who uses neopronouns. i hope you can come to a point of greater understanding in the future.
This isn’t my first experience with people using neopronouns, and I explicitly stated a willingness to use neopronouns.
edit: removing my comments below because the discussion is no longer about respecting trans identities and is just a slapfight. fuck transphobes and get over yourselves on a single tiny user who you should have blocked months ago if you actually had a problem.
You’re engaging in an online community that’s become so insular and self-absorbed that it’s become indistinguishable from parody. You’re literally defending dragonfucker as a gender, and furthermore saying that questioning any identity is inherently unacceptable.
Get help.
Literally all genders are made up, why are you getting so bent outta shape over a totally reasonable rule just because one person who stands to benefit from it is kinda annoying???
Literally all genders are made up
Gravity is just made up too. Doesn’t mean I’m going to take someone preaching intelligent falling seriously.
why are you getting so bent outta shape over a totally reasonable rule just because one person who stands to benefit from it is kinda annoying???
Look, if you want to have your fantasy roleplay where dragonfucker is a gender, that’s on you. Like I said in the message I was removed for, I’m no longer participating in Blahaj. You have fun with your faeries and dragons.
Wrong right off the bat. Go and read any of drag’s comments describing their gender and report back. Drag has said consistently said something quite different from what you falsely claim so I am curious as to who/what muddled your reading.
Because drag uses first person neopronouns. Drag’s drag/dragself pronouns are person independent. They’re inflected and conjugated the same way in all grammatical persons. They represent drag’s identity as a dragon rider.
Drag rides dragons and also “rides” dragons
Drag, being straight, is attracted to the opposite gender; dragons. Everyone who tells you their sexuality is giving the same information drag just gave you, but with the details changed.
And even if you were correct in your assertion, it still wouldn’t give an excuse to misgender. Besides they/them, one of the most common GNC expressions are fae pronouns, while fairies of course don’t exist either. Are you aware of this, and of the parallels with the identity you are disparaging?
‘Fae’ as a cutesy neopronoun I have no problem with. Anyone who identifies as literally one of the fae folk?
Yes, that I do have a problem with.
…which you, each time, follow with “your gender isn’t real, because [you are trolling/XYZ isn’t real].” Same invalidating behavior.
“Your gender isn’t real, because what you’re claiming literally isn’t real nor possible for any human being to be.”
Like, holy fucking shit, should I go and take back every time I criticized the conservative ‘joke’ denigrating trans folk of “I identify as an attack helicopter hurr” because that’s now perfectly valid?
I agree with the mods on this one. You don’t go into people’s spaces and tell them they’re living wrong unless they’re actively hurting other people. And at the end of the day, using a different word as a pronoun isn’t going to hurt you. Heck if you have an app you can just tag them with it.
Using a different word as a pronoun does no harm at all. Requiring that other people gender you properly is perfectly reasonable. Demanding that other people go along with calling you a dragon, and whining about it in ways that cause needless drama if they don’t, does do harm.
This whole issue has absolutely nothing to do with trans rights. The right to tell someone who you think is being ridiculous, that they’re being ridiculous, is an important right on an open communications network. Infringe on that right, and your network suddenly isn’t a good place to be anymore, because people will have their conversations non-consensually interfered with by patently ridiculous stuff which they won’t be permitted to say anything back to. On a network where quite literally the only available currency is words, that is a significant loss.
its not the pronouns. its the excuse to behave in a manner which is tyrannical and using made up pronouns to shield you from any criticism.
these places get to a point where inclusivity becomes weaponized. “if you’re not immediately accepting of my specific demands, you’re transphobic. don’t dare ask questions. Cis scum only does that.”
there’s a fairly obvious line between the two. and this seems pretty apparently an attempt to use othergender stuff in a way to control others.
That’s not it. All pronouns are made up. There are people out there right now using Xe/Xim and they’re accepted. If you change languages the words change there too. Identity is consistently a big deal in the trans space, as seen by dead naming and conservative jokes about pronouns.
So we don’t get to make that decision anymore and honestly it’s the easiest thing in the world. They aren’t controlling me by telling me to use their pronouns, for example I can still tell them they’re wrong on an issue, I can still walk away, I can still take an ad out telling the world that person has a bad take, I can still ignore them or let them live rent free in my head. Saying pronouns control other people is ridiculous. The only thing they control is the identity of the person using them.
read what I said again. its not the pronouns. its using them as a way to weaponize what is and isn’t acceptable.
“This person dared to ask a question about how I identify myself, they’re a terf for even asking!”
“This person said Fae creatures aren’t real! i am angry at them, BAN!”
if you accept these two above examples as good and logical, then we will never agree. and frankly, defending those who behave in such a manner makes a larger divide between those that are trans or othergender and those that aren’t.
people are allowed to ask questions and try and clarify what they don’t understand. and having to remember specific pronouns for every individual on an internet forum is a completely unacceptable thing to ask.
Yeah. The benefit of the decentralized fediverse is that individual smaller communities can enforce standards like this that may be unreasonable to enforce on something much larger-scale.
You’re allowed to vehemently disagree with my lifestyle choices and think that what I do and say is dumb and stupid. And there are environments where discourse calling me out for what you think is stupid is welcome. But clearly, blahaj is not that space. Most of the internet is a space where those who use neopronouns have to fairly constantly defend their use of them, and blahaj seems to have been created very specifically to be a place where such constant vigilance is unnecessary for their users.
i love drag, and i don’t think about drag half as much as all the weird fuckers who get SO worked up about drag all the fucken time
I don’t even remember the last time I had an interaction with drag, but when the admins come down on the side of “Dragonfucker IS a gender and questioning that is ban-worthy”, I find it a sign to move on.
“moving on” would be not continuing to complain about it, but you do you babe 💖
Despite not being shy in the least about coming here, I didn’t come here to kvetch until comments on my final/leaving post in 196, which was not where the discussion originated, were removed for the offenses - as the OP shows - of ‘citing the modlog as a reason why you’re leaving’ and ‘I prefer they/them but I will use neopronouns as requested’, both of which I felt were sufficiently irritating to warrant bitching about.
This is twords everyone, not specifically pug,
I really don’t understand how this is so hard for people. If calling someone a hippopotamus makes them happy and doesn’t inconvenience me then you bet your ass I’ll be saying hippopotamus. Seems insane to all get so worked up over something that has no negative impact other than making you not mindlessly say ‘they’. Literally just accept it, or block. Downvoting about it every time you see drag isnt gonna fix anything. That’s harassment, and harassment ain’t cool.
Never thought that would be controversial on Lemmy.
I just really think people have lost their ability to see that someone else is on the other side of the computer screen. As the bumper sticker that got mega upvoted goes, “trans people existing does literally nothing negative to your life”
You don’t even have to respect drags opinions either! You can just treat drag like any other person who has a lot of bad takes (excluding gender). My upvote ratio is literally 36 up 32 down, but I’ll still do something as simple as writing ‘drag’ instead of ‘they’ to make the person on the other side of my computer screen just a little bit happier.
Happy new years, btw.
I really don’t understand how this is so hard for people. If calling someone a hippopotamus makes them happy and doesn’t inconvenience me then you bet your ass I’ll be saying hippopotamus.
And if the admins begin removing people who say human beings can’t be hippopotami?
That, for me, was the reason I left/announced leaving. I don’t give a shit about drag, specifically. Drag could be deleted tomorrow and it wouldn’t make a difference. Drag could have been IP banned immediately after Ada started removing comments and it wouldn’t have made a difference to me.
Once “You can’t be a dragon” is considered a sin on par with transphobia, or, by the arguments of some of the Blahaj commenters here, literally the same thing, I’m fucking out. I’ll generally humor people with inoffensive oddities, but when it comes down to “Agree or shut up” about it, I’m not eager to stick around.
I really don’t understand how this is so hard for people. If calling someone a hippopotamus makes them happy
I can’t speak for everyone about this, but referring to someone as (like in the example that you use) a “hippopotamus” is fine. I personally think of myself as a cat, and though I don’t personally enjoy actually being referred to as such I can understand other people who would and I can accommodate them. My personal wrinkle with this is far more nuanced.
I’m a gender abolitionist. I regard “gender” as a particular aspect of identity that holds cultural significance. I don’t think aspects of identity should be given so much consideration and weight, and I don’t think it’s useful to refer to something as “gender” when it previously hasn’t been, because that makes my goals less achievable. I also don’t think there should be gendered or personalized pronouns, period. I use gendered pronouns because that’s what society expects of me, but these new ones are not only unnecessary the same way gendered pronouns are but also often aestheticly displeasing. For these reasons and others, I get annoyed by neopronouns, especially bespoke ones. Furthermore, I find the idea of pulling more aspects of identity under the nebulous umbrella of “gender” to be regressive.
Hope that helps you understand.
