“Sorry, this job doesn’t seem like a good fit or healthy working environment. Have a good rest of your day”
I’ll bring you his pen to prove he’s been dealt with. That will only be $45,000.
I’m an Engineer. I am not customer facing. Put my pen back.
In fact, if a customer accidentally enters your office,you hiss and hide your face in your cowl like an old school vampire being exposed to sunlight.
I hate cold air blowing on me, and I always wear my hoodie inside. So this is accurate.
take the pen and leave. when they ask for the pen back, say it’s $10.
I got a sales job offer on the spot by first highlighting the limited use of a single pen and without extra’s on hand its negative business impacts. Then stated I had tons of pens available in my car and positioned selling them at least 100, but recommended they acquire 1000+ as this prevents potential issues plus gets them a better deal. Pretty solid approach in my experience.
Selling is an art… and this is why I’m not in sales. I have absolutely no interest in trying to convince somebody to buy something.
True sales is just filling a need, sometimes the customer knows they need it but others are unaware of it. Good sales reps will not sell something unless it makes sense for everyone involved.
Sales has fuck-all to do with filling a need. Sales is the invention of problems for which the only solution is the liberal application of money.
Engineering is filling a need.
Yea, I was never exactly in sales (Geek Squad in store employee is the closest I ever came) but I remember thinking everyone who was like lets get rid of commission in retail sales were very mislead. I still remember the difference in Sears employees in the 90s when I first got a PC and the salesman actually knew to look at the box of the game I was trying to buy and make sure it’d run on my PC before selling it to me. I also remember them knowing about the stuff they sold. This is because with commission, even in small towns you could make a career of it and you’d have actual experienced staff in the stores. As far as I could ever tell, the good salespeople wanted you to trust them, and not to just make a one time huge sale - they wanted you to come back again and again.
Once they all went to non-commission, I recall that being a “selling point” of the stores, but now all you had was a rotating cast of highschool and college summer workers who cared exactly as much as minimum wage paid them to care… i.e. not at all. And they occasionally became unable to even read the boxes they were “selling”. It turned them into less efficient cash register attendants.
Just cross your arms, smile wryly, and comment on how pathetic the Interviewer’s pen is. Cheap material, runny ink, a grip that’s painful to hold. Wish him good luck in taking notes on subsequent interviews.
Then lean in, and say “But, you know? I’ve got a premium writing utensil. It’s crafted in the Netherlands by a Space Age engineering firm. It’s designed to fit comfortably between your fingers. And the Indian ink that runs through it glistens and glides smoothly through a specially crafted tip.”
Pull out a business card with absolutely beautiful handwriting on it. Just as he expresses surprise and interest, sigh and say “But… It’s really not for you. It’s really more of a thing for your boss, or your boss’s boss.”
Start getting up to leave, and wait for him to come running after you.
Only downside is that, according to The Game, his pen will inevitably want to sleep with you after all that negging
