145 points
*

Surprised they didn’t add:

  • Ukraine
  • Hunter Biden’s Laptop
  • LGBTQ+ community
  • BLM
  • George Soros
  • Bill Gates

The usual suspects

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76 points

How can you possibly forget some of the greatest hits? Obama’s tan suit Obama’s birth certificate Hillary’s emails

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32 points

Not to mention socialism, CRT wokeness, affirmative action, globalism…

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9 points

I’m sure Ben Shapiro will work wokeness into it somehow.

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17 points

Obama’s spicy dijon mustard…

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9 points

What, no love for arugula-gate?

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5 points

I’m feeling giddy inside because I have not yet heard of arugula-gate. Please share.

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8 points

Dijon mustard.

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19 points
*

“Yes, Marjorie, you keep telling us how magnificent Hunter’s penis is, but it probably didn’t knock the bridge down. Now can you please put the pictures away?”

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10 points

You forgot mother of all problems: WoKeiSM!

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7 points

Jewish space laser. Everyone knows that.

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6 points

You forgot Buttery Males!

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3 points

They are. Don’t read twitter. Any republican buzzword is being thrown around as conspiracy theories for this accident.

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1 point

There was one Ukrainian crew member actually so the conspiracy theorists are going crazy.

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1 point
Deleted by creator
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129 points

I’m pretty sure it was that cargo ship, Dali

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66 points

That’s true but if we’d built a border wall in the middle of that river instead of a bridge then the bridge wouldn’t have collapsed… walls do work.

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50 points

Dam, that’s a good idea.

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20 points

I see what you did there. That was a dam good joke

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75 points

I didn’t stay at a Fox News Propaganda Roach Motel last night, but I do have a degree in Mechanical Engineering, and I’m gonna go with the wild hypothesis that the big heavy boat hit a part of the bridge that was holding a decent amount of weight. That introduced a decent stress factor which weakened that part’s structural integrity, it started to give way, and the rest of the bridge followed suit.

But we all know big boats can’t hit bridge beams or something because open borders cause Covid lockdowns.

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27 points

Idk, I have an engineering minor and I think immigrants are a much more likely cause than a giant fuckin boat crashing into the bridge

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21 points
*

I don’t have an engineering degree at all, but I design my 3D printed parts, and I think that immigrants stole the boat and rammed the bridge because the chemtrails in the sky made them all go crazy

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4 points

…and they couldn’t mentally overcome the chemtrails because all the 5G activated their COVID vaccines to turn them into government slaves. IT WAS AN INSIDE JOB! And no one has the fucking balls to say it.

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2 points

U forgot the Covid tho

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24 points

I am not qualified to have a technical discussion on this matter.

However: big boat hurts big bridge; makes sense to me.

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10 points

Republicans say such stupid things you don’t need any real qualifications to prove them wrong. Usually, you don’t even need to address whether the claim is true or false, you can just use basic logic to conclude that the claim is fallacious.

There is no logical connection between this bridge collapse and border policy or COVID response. The burden of logically linking these things lies with those making the claim. We have no burden to prove that no connection exists, we can simply point out that the claim has no logical explanation for connecting these things.

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7 points

BIG BOATS CANT BEND STEEL BEAMS!!!

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5 points

Hey if jet fuel can’t melt steel beams, imagine how little a COLD BOAT would do? Checkmate, Atheists. /s

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67 points

If 9/11 happened today half of Republicans on Twitter would be blaming Secretary Buttigieg before the second plane hit.

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49 points
*

Fun fact: I had a cousin in the second tower on 9/11. They told everyone in his office to remain calm and he was just like “nope” and got the fuck out

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34 points
*

It’s rather important to remain calm in emergencies.

Particularly when noping the fuck out- I’m glad your cousin made it out.

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22 points

Remain calm on your way out of the building.

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15 points

Keep calm and GTFO.

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10 points

And his coworkers?

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23 points
*

I think they made the “nope” decision as a group (or at least his team). I was young when it happened and honestly haven’t brought it up with him since. I figure it’s kind of a traumatic thing to just bring up at a family gathering.

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-16 points

To shreds, you say?

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62 points

That is a serious disconnect from reality.

I mean, this was a failure on multiple levels, but Covid and immigration aren’t anywhere near the list of things that went wrong.

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14 points

well, what else happened today? Trump started selling Bibles. Coincidence? I’m just asking questions.

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1 point

Yeah what if someone could make a bunch of money doing nothing and then lying on “news” programming about anything they can get away with for their own gain? Won’t someone please think of the robber barons and clergy and how this affects their ability to suppress and control the population??

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