As a recommendation to anyone answer this thread (which is an interesting one, by the way, thank you Sunroc!), feel free to use a throwaway before disclosing things that could be used against you as harassment.
I can only imagine this could be a toxic person’s wet dream to know so much about the bad and the ugly side of a list of people, and as the Lemmy userbase is still low, usernames are easy to recognize.
Well, people say I’m funny. I’m glad they like my little jokes. The trouble is that I’m not as funny as I’d like to be, because I use humor as a coping mechanism… Which brings us to the alcoholism.
Fellow alcoholic here (in recovery) that’s waay more common than you might think, I know I did this myself for a long time and I still like to be silly when its appropriate but being genuine can really be a lot better for my mental health and relationships
I think I’m realizing that the drinking is something I tend to overdo when I’m bored.
Still haven’t made any friends in my new area yet so I get bored too much. It’s high time I crawled out of my shell.
I was really close to saying something funny to you. I’m glad I couldn’t think of anything good.
Karaoke god over here!
I hope you don’t internalize the language of your transitioning journey as ugly. A person being true to themselves is a very beautiful thing. I wouldn’t know about living that experience, but I think you probably aren’t giving yourself enough credit.
The good: you can rely on me. If I say I’m going to do something or be somewhere, I always see it through.
The bad: I don’t sleep. Not healthy and bad for your brain.
The ugly: the amount of beer I go through in a week has increased exponentially since 2020 and I kinda don’t want to lower it back down.
Before the pandemic and everything I was a social drinker, would go to a bar once a week, hang out with pals and have a few, Uber home and all good. Once I lost being able to go out I lost most of my buddies too. I still have my friends, the close ones, and we all relied on each other to make it through the isolation but none of them live here any longer so being social and going out isn’t something I get to do anymore sadly. That and the crushing knowledge of all the people who died kinda has me not making great choices.
Sorry probably over shared there at the end.
Being reliable is an asset I always look for in friends. I hate when people flake…
Did you sleep better before your issues with alcohol? I worked in a rehab, so I’m a little familiar with disordered drinking. Do you think it’s a physical addiction or a tool for coping with the loss you have had to deal with over the past 3 years?
I wish you grace during your hard times friend. It can get better.
Nah the not sleeping thing is just a norm for me. Always has been since I was a kid.
I don’t think either. I enjoy doing it and it doesn’t cause anything negative in my life (currently), although I know the potential later down the road to my health.
Thanks for your kindness - we need more in the world.
I think you need to talk to a professional about the alcohol part. No shade, it’s just booze gets the better of you quickly and it would be easier to address now than when you’re 50 and need a liver transplant. I honestly suggest talking to your doctor about an antabuse medication, I take naltrexone for another reason and it does wonders for mood and anxiety.
I have and am. Right now it’s not terrible. At peak I was averaging a 750 ml bottle of vodka every four days. I think my cap with beer right now is like 5 a night. A hand over fist improvement.
I’ve tried a lot of different drugs for different things - anxiety, depression, etc and I’ve found I’m much happier when I just work hard. I’ve taken to exercising regularly and having a physical project twice a week and it takes my mind off it, makes me tired, and I look forward to going to bed.
Obviously we are all massively different as people and we all deal with all our own things but I am taking steps to rein it in. I just still drink more than I want to is all. More a complaint than anything terribly scary.
Thanks for your advice! Keep being kind. We need more kind people.
I drank something like an average of over 2 bottles of bourbon a week for the majority of the covid lockdown which I did longer than most. I think a lot of people fell into depression and drank heavily… I always had a bit of a problem with substance abuse. Find that it’s much easier to stay in a better place mentally if I keep a regular schedule, and exercise, and don’t drink at all. Easier said than done, and everyone’s different. Best of luck.
Thanks mate. I’m working on it and the first step is realizing you have a problem so I’ve got that behind me.
Another note - how long was your lockdown? I think I finally went back to “normal” the middle of 2022 but I stopped going everywhere in a mask (unless I have a cough or sneeze or something) the start of this year.
The good: I’m a very curious person and will always look up answers to virtually any question I have. I’m excited to learn new things, I’m an excellent problem-solver, and I’ll share what I can with anyone who asks, particularly at work.
The bad: I’m content with being alone most of the time. People love being around me and having me company, but I don’t make an effort to maintain friendships and the relationships I do have feel like such a struggle to keep up with.
The ugly: I’m severely unmotivated. I’ll do what I need to keep my job and survive, but I don’t have the drive to want to be super successful. I love starting new hobbies but I’ll become hyper-obsessed and suck literally all the joy out of them until I’m no longer interested.
