66 points

5$ of mesh is an option.

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24 points

<2$ of large keyring is an option

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17 points

Stealing a doormat is also an option.

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11 points

That’s how you get a turd on your doorknob from a neighbor

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3 points

Then $40 for sexy cargo pants to hold your giant keyring.

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44 points

I think the real question here is wtf kind of crazy doorknob is that?!?!?

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31 points

I’m betting this is less of a knob and more of an immobile handle.

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8 points

You’d be correct, my front door works similarly (minus the key-swallower under it).

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7 points

That just makes this even more evil lol

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2 points

How so

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2 points

What’s the difference? (Asking as a non-native English speaker)

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2 points
*

The key opens what is basically a deadbolt, and the only actual latch for the door.

The “knob” isn’t so much a knob, but a stationary/fixed handle for pulling the door.

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1 point

Door knob can be twisted to open the door. Door handle is static (it doesn’t twist or move) it’s just a convenient place to grab the door.

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8 points

90° rotated robotic horse penis and it. Is. A. Fan. Of. Yoooohooouuuu!

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5 points

Small pistol grip, John woo style.

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40 points

I’d keep the keys attached to a belt or wrists or something. If I lived there long enough, I’d even steal the lid and replace it with something finer…

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18 points

It’s fine the person in the picture is a pro that can hold the keys like a power puff girl

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4 points

Wasn’t there a scene where they discussed how weird their hands were?

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3 points

I think when the professor got turned into one or something and couldn’t pick things up

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39 points

I hate drain holes that appear to go all the way down to bedrock where you can feel heat coming from the earth below. Like it’s the first chapter of Journey to the Center of the Earth.

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5 points

Guy in front of a no knock raid party gets to confirm the hollow earth theory for himself.

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2 points

Wherever he saw a hole he always wanted to know the depth of it. To him this was important.

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15 points
*

Cheap pickset and learn to do it: priceless. No. 1 life skill.

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11 points

Until you drop that down the grate too

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11 points

Lockpicklawyer alt account detected /jk

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7 points

At least where i live your regular home locks are secure enough that non-destructive entry requires specialized tools and close to LPL level skill. In my country there was once a serial burglar that could do that and for a long time police didnt even believe the that there even was any burglary.

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7 points

You in one of those schmancy countries where everyone’s got them fucken assa abloys on their tool sheds?

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4 points

Ye but the sheds have the worse assa abloys

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